May 19, 2023

The Adventures of Jujutsu Jack and Ford Junior - Chapter 4

                   A cute Hispanic girl named Camilla stood before a colorful Watermania Waterpark map attached to a mobile bulletin board.  She gave a park history presentation in front of several new hires, with Jack and Junior in the audience.  Jack was entranced by Camilla and started to daydream a set of Tik Tok videos featuring his rap-star MMA moves and Camilla in tight booty shorts kissing and licking all over him.    

                “Dude, you’re slobbering,” whispered Junior interrupting Jack’s daydream. 

                “No, I’m not,” replied Jack wiping the slobber from his chin.

                “Oooooo, you like Camilla.”

                “Keep it down, bro; she’s talking.”    

                After the history presentation, Camilla gave a tour of the park.  She showed where the employee break area was, where to clock in and out from, where the central lifeguard station was, and the entrance to the main security office.    

                “In case you haven’t noticed, this park has numerous security cameras in which we are under surveillance and monitored from this location.  Only security personnel can enter this area where you need a special access code.  But since none of you are in security, you don’t need to worry about it.  Let’s move on,” said Camilla continuing the tour. 

                “That must be Moose’s lair,” whispered Junior to Jack.

                “Why is he called Moose?” whispered Jack back.

                “Because I can hear and see everything inside the park.  Now move it!” Moose blared from a tiny speaker in front of the security door.

                “That still doesn’t make sense,” said Jack to himself.


                 Junior and Jack were chugging full steam ahead at their new job, fitted with their Grounds Crew uniform, a pick-up poker stick for trash, and a plastic trash bag.  The two boys attempted the most apparent “tough dude” attitude, complete with black ball caps and black sunglasses, which was only a front for whenever a hot hick or cute girl was within their vicinity.  It was tough not to drool or slobber all over themselves, and Tammy felt a little sorry for them too.  But she knew that after a week of exposing the virgins to sun tan oil and barely boobies, they would get used to the exposed wet, wild hair, shiny sun-kissed skin, and Chad “The Beefcake Fab” head asshole lifeguard with his over-the-top neon eighties sunglasses.           

                “Dude, I’m dying without my phone.  I could be making mad clips for Tik Tok right now,” said Jack to Junior.

                “Can’t, dude, company policy.”

                “Fuck, I know,” said Jack, frustrated as he watched almost every other park party-goer take several selfies and video shots all around the park. 

                “You know this isn’t the only water park, right?” asked Junior.

                “Yea, but Pirate’s Plunge is like, far, dude,” said Jack

                “Just saying there’s another option.”

                “S’up, fellas?” interrupted Tammy.

                “Uh, hey, Tammy,” stammered Junior.

                “I hear you guys talking about Pirate’s Plunge in Des Moines.  Not a good idea, that’s our competition.  Those fucktards have been cheating the 4th of July relay races.  If I find any of our employees giving that wet rubber ranch a single penny, I’m firing them on the spot.  I trust you boys will stay loyal,” she said, then walked away. 

                “Relay races, I wonder what that’s all about?” asked Jack.

                “Camilla might know.  Why don’t you ask her?  Now’s your chance to ask her out.”


                “C’mon, bro, get your cherry popped, show her you got a huge dick.  Chicks love to be treated like shit.  That's how I got my cherry popped,” smiled Junior.

                “What’s going on, guys?” interrupted Camilla.

                “Sup, Camilla,” said Junior eying her up and down.  

                “Shouldn’t you boys be making your rounds?” asked Camilla.

                “Oh shit, your right!  But Jack here needs to ask you something,” said Junior.

                “What?” Jack was scared and got pissed at Junior for calling him out like that.

                “I’m out; gotta get the trash, bro,” said Junior leaving Jack behind with Camilla, stroking the handle of his trash stick like a hand job.  Lucky for Jack, Camilla did not see what Junior was doing. 

                “Yes, Jack?  What do you need to ask me?” asked Camilla.

                “Um, Tammy said something about a 4th of July relay race?

                “Already?  Okay.  Well, um, now’s not the time.  Come find me after work, and I’ll tell you.”

                “Okay, like, you want to go have some pizza or something?” he asked nervously.

                “Not really, I don't date co-workers.”

                “Oh, nothing like that, just friends, y’know, talk about the race?"

                “Howabout I get all of you new coworkers together so I can tell you all about the relay race?"

                “Cool, cool,” said Jack, lingering.

                “So, are you going to get back to work now?”

                “Holy shit, that guy just littered.  I need to go pick that up!”  Jack got the hint and raced away from Camilla, making her smile.  She was intrigued by this boy that was originally from Florida since she was not used to seeing someone like him in these parts of Omaha.  

Moose was sitting in a bat-man-styled security cave, complete with several surveillance tv monitors, keyboards, and speakers, watching and listening to Jack and Junior.  He was intent on discovering some hidden secret the boys might have.  But he didn’t know for sure on account that he spent all his time inside his man cave getting educated by every other police show there was on television.

                “See anything?” asked Tammy interrupting his paranoia.  She looked at one of the monitors displaying a Tik Tok video.

                “Take a look at this,” said Moose, quickly pushing a couple of buttons to reveal a Watermania customer caught with a hellacious bathing suit wedgie on Tik Tok.

                Tammy read the title, “’Are you sure you want to get caught at this park with a #waterparkwedgie?’  Are you kidding?  Do we know who posted this?”

                “It’s someone inside the park, that’s for sure,” said Moose.


                “Pirates, Trick-Tokers, disgruntled customers, can’t say for sure at this point.”

                “This is bad PR for the park,” said Tammy.

                “Are you sure about those two?” asked Moose, spotting Jack and Junior on one of the monitors.

                “Give them some time; they’ll come in handy soon enough.  How’s my girl?” asked Tammy watching a bodacious hot blond lifeguard wearing a red lifeguard bathing suit.

                “Hot as ever.  Man, you got a good one.”    

                “Women know what women want, Moose.”

                “Can you record you two some night, y’know, for educational purposes?” asked Moose.

                “Still haven’t learned anything from your online porn yet, have you?”

                “Sad, isn’t it?  I’m watching every other dick get action except my own.”

                “Company can pay for your, uh, addiction problem there….”

                “NO, nope, no addiction, got it under control.  Besides, watching the park is more important.”

                “Whatever you say there, bud,” said Tammy giving Moose a pat on the back. 

                When Moose heard Tammy leave his security man cave, he hung his head low and started crying.  He did not want to admit that he had an online porn addiction, especially to Tammy, his HR Manager.  He felt stuck between a rock and a hard place, and his ego prevented him from admitting he was weak.  So, to get unstuck, he opened a drawer, found a porn magazine, and went into his Batman bathroom to jerk himself off.       

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