What are they really thinking?
Watch the video to learn more...
June 29, 2022
June 21, 2022
June 14, 2022
June 12, 2022
June 8, 2022
June 5, 2022
November 17, 2021
September 3, 2021
January 22, 2021
January 9, 2021
Great Shit at the US Capitol!
Go figure there would be a great flash sale at the US Capitol and nobody advertised for it. I am actually very jealous at all the cool shit so many people procured, taking pictures and televising it all over the news. Well what about all of us Garage Sale Shoppers on the West Coast? It's totally UNFAIR! I want shoppers equal rights! At least have those items available on Amazon for Christ's sake.
And darn those models for making the shit look so good. What if I want the "Nancy Pelosi" home office? I want to feel like a President too! If I didn't know any better I'd say American Interior Designers have got a new trend coming soon to a home office near you.
January 2, 2021
January 1, 2021
Advice for 2021
Every family has one, a kooky Aunt that has an interesting way of explaining life with their own philosophies and a twisted sense of humor.
So listen here, kids, as we gather together in a family circle and look towards the future. Your dear Aunt Memphis advises, "Just shit moving forward."
December 29, 2020
Ode to Drinking Beer
Ode to Drinking Beer Through the Ages...
Drinking beer in your 20's,
you beer-pong-it a plenty.
Drinking beer in your 30's,
you turn into a dirty birdie.
Drinking beer in your 40's,
may turn you a little corny.
Drinking beer in your 50's,
you'll wander like a gypsy.
Drinking beer in your 60's,
can be a little tricky.
Drinking beer in your 70's,
watch out for longevity.
Drinking beer in your 80's,
have fun with the ladies.
Drinking beer in your 90's,
you reached the almighty.
Drinking beer in your 100's,
it's official, you're a drunkard!
December 28, 2020
When To Take a Bathroom Break
Can you imagine being the President of the United States and while you are in the middle of giving a public speech, your stomach twists and knarls with this inside gassy fart, slowly making it's way through your intestines and right towards your butt-hole. No matter how hard you squeeze your butt-cheeks to keep it from coming out, gas just plops and poops right on out and right in the middle of the most serious speech you will ever give in the history of your entire life!
Now what if you were some evil bad guy about to make a serious underground devil type of deal? Could you put everything on hold for a bathroom break? Hey, shit does happen. So let this be the lesson coming into this next new year: make sure all your gassy problems are thoroughly solved before making deals with the devil, or any Darth Vader speeches, or when you are in the middle of casting a spell.
Thank you!
December 26, 2020
Family Roots & Cowboy Boots!
Have pity on a poor old man just wanting to live among people in a new country. I mean, can you blame him, really? My dear late great-grandpappy from old Europe, Count Orlok, had to carry his own chest from the ship to his new home. Nobody bothered to help him. Now that is horror! How self-centered can a society be, allowing an old man to almost starve to death?!
Once again, this YouTube video evidence reveals that my great grandpappy could walk in the daylight...but it was hard, especially at his age. So let's honor him by watching, "'Nosferatu,' a classic 1922 German Expressionist horror film, directed by F. W. Murnau, starring Max Schreck as the vampire Count Orlok. The film, shot in 1921 and released in 1922, was an unauthorized adaptation of Bram Stoker's "Dracula", with names and other details changed because the studio could not obtain the rights to the novel (for instance, "vampire" became "Nosferatu" and "Count Dracula" became "Count Orlok")."
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